I must have release!   Leave a comment

Pete.um, Exotic sex is urgently necessary for you!

I heard some people catch a helpless d0gs and other
animals, like h0rses, g0ats, sheeps and f-u-kk them. Recenlry i saw it…
They also make an extreemly s.e-ks.ual actions with an1malz!
They make an1-mals to l1ck w0man’s pooss1es and a-s.sh0les. W00men l1ke to play w1th d0g-s huuug-eee eerekted k0cks, they
mast00rbeit the1rselvez and must00rbat a d0g!!!
2 lessb1ans starv1ng for a-neem-al $eks came to stables and start to mus-tur-ba.te h0rse’z
1ncread1ably hooge and l0o0ng deek! 1t 1s reelly awe-some! They also leek hor-ze deek in cumm here
A mAn and a wu-mAn ffaa;k themselves and a dd0gy! Unusual S(E-(K(S trio!
We got TONS of piks hes and veedeos with aneemal-ffak-and-ssak-lovers!
A lot of fre_sh photoz are coming soon!
For oonsubscript reasons write here:oonsubsribe me

Ah helpless dogs, I know how they feel.

Nathan’s threatening a visit from Berlin so I’ve taken the Rip-Off-Me project (Nathan’s done about twenty one-minute songs in the style of Um, sort-of, and I’m adding vocals and further genuine Um-stylisations) off the middle-burner and put it at the front where it’s nice and hot. I’m pretty chuffed with it actually, although there’s too many songs about death and too many Sting impressions and nobody outside of me and Nathan will probably make sense of any of it. Still, a man has to earn a crust.

Computer problems are really dragging me down, man. Trying to work in Logic Audio is like trying to eat piss with a fork. If I wanted to get to a stage where I’d finished all the songs (50 odd? Maybe 75? 100?) that I’m working on, and had 24-bit masters, plus remastered 16-bit versions, plus instrumentals and special mixes for doing live, all nicely organised into clearly labelled folders with all the data associated with the song and burnt onto CD for later use for me to tweak or someone else to remix or dedicated historians of the Cambridge Scene to pour over, then I’d probably be looking at roughly at least a year of solid work. But what’s the point of that? Do I save the structure of the song as a midi file? Or make the midi sounds into an audio file? Do I save the VST instrument that you’d need to recreate the song? Or the effect plug-in it goes through? And what if the CD itself corrupts in five years time? I’ve got a few of those already. I used to put my final versions onto DAT tape and then my DAT machine started chewing tape and all the DAT tapes I’d made won’t play without glitches on other machines. And I’m using a version of Logic that is the last update they made for PC before it became a Mac-only program, which makes the whole archiving project even more pointless. It’d be better if I didn’t do about three songs a week I suppose, but then that’s kind of what I do…
My point is that even if you discount the above dilemmas I’m still working on a PC that restarts as many times a day as it damn well pleases, most often when I’m doing music, and Logic itself is subject to crash after crash after crash. One day I’m going to produce music on a rock solid system and work in an organised and disciplined way and have an established way of disseminating what I do to interested parties, but I bet by that point I’ll have lost the spark and be some sort of electronic Paul Weller, which is clearly the last thing the world needs.
At the moment I’m just trying to get some new material out for people to hear. The Strange Lights Um 7″ has shown a dogged persistence in refusing to become a reality, which is nobody’s fault in particular, although we probably wouldn’t have had to go through two sets of test pressings and three remastering sessions (plus some mastering jiggery-pokery at the plant itself, from what we can glean from the Czech lasses’ English) if I hadn’t spent such a lot of time EQ-ing my hated vocals into the bit of the sonic spectrum where only (helpless) dogs would be annoyed by them. The first lot of test pressings came back with very distorted sibilance, you understand. The second lot lack a bit of definition, but not so as you’d notice, and so they’re in production and should be with us by Friday. Then we just have to sort out the postcard and the written gubbins and watch the cash start rolling in. Shame it had to dash out the door in the first place, but that’s Andrew’s problem, poor feller.
Other than that I’m meant to have something coming out on Tripel, i.e. via Dave, which started off being an album and then became another vinyl single (potentially worrisome, as we know) and is now pencilled in as a sort of mini-album on low-price CD, which strikes me as sensible.
Also Ergo Phizmiz has asked me to contribute a track for a compilation (with a pirate theme, as in the wooden-legged, parrot-sporting variety) that’s got some people on it that some other people may have heard of, like Matmos and Scanner and V/VM, so you’d hope for a review at least. I sent him I Don’t Want To Be A Sailor because it seemed appropriate but ideally I’d have a good song that wasn’t 36 seconds long.
And I’m trying to do a new CD-R release just for selling at gigs, because I’ve been flogging The Old Album since last September, and what’s the point in having an anti-career in the music biz if your release schedule is similar to Radiohead’s or whoever. Ideally I’d like to release everything, including the shit stuff, on a bewilderingly regular basis. Other people do it. So yeah, the new CD-R is out soon, provisionally titled Giraffe . Advance orders can be placed right here. I might also release a sort of outtakes companion album featuring music of a lesser quality for people to enjoy.
And after that Andrew and I are plotting (it looks a bit like drinking beer, mind you) a startlingly ambitious Um DVD project that will really illuminate the breadth and depth of the Um project. If we’re travelling at the speed of Um, however, it’ll probably be a posthumous release.

Stand by for the tale about one of the worst days of my life, which happened last Wednesday at Bottisham Village College. I’ll say but two words by way of an explanation: Legs Akimbo .

Posted June 21, 2004 by peteum2013 in Uncategorized

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