fuck the thief at the station   Leave a comment

This is old news (I can’t be current right now because I’m right in the thick of this moving flats biz):

OK – really quick entry. Played an indifferent-ish gig in Notting Hill yesterday, after which bass-matey from The Dirty Pins told me to fuck off. All I’d said to him was “Nice set. Pretty…uh… full-on”, ‘cos we met in the bogs, but I wasn’t being entirely sincere, so I guess that’s fair enough. At Kings Cross I bought a 6-for-5 Stella deal and hurried my sorry ass onto the train. When I got off at Cambridge I was walking up the platform, listening to The Magnetic Fields loud when I felt a hand sneak into my backpack. I turned to see a matey hustling right behind me in my personal goddamn space, and instinctively I reached inside his jacket to see what he was holding nicked in there. I’d been walking round fucking London all day feeling paranoid about my DV camera/minidisk player/MP3 player etc and jazz on my back, so I was primed for the subjective experience of victimhood, even if I had some senses cut off and some fairly dulled. Anyway matey was a clever if unambitious thief because the next thing I know he has sailed my half-inched Stella can (for that is what he’s lifted) into the air and instead of confronting the cunt in the arse I find myself athletically moving and stretching my hands out to catch the descending tin, cricket-style, but it hits the concrete deck nonetheless. By the time I have stopped it rolling and have it in my hand mateyboots has smuggled himself into the crowd and I am stood there looking like an alcoholic patsy, and with the clever music blaring on. I felt kind of wronged and invaded and stuff, but I still drew some comfort from the fact that some opportunist street-criminal thought he could steal beer off Pete Um, and then was forced to face up to the fact that the situation was more complex that he had hitherto surmised. I ended up giving the same can to Man From Uranus to drink, so whatever, and fuck the thief at the station.

Posted March 20, 2005 by peteum2013 in Uncategorized

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